jaecakes

As I type my mother is lecturing, lecturing, nagging yelling about absolute nonsense and I'm going crazy. I can't STAND being in my house for this long. With this family. I hate sounding ungrateful but it's hard to live with people who criticize every thing you do, yet they're such hypocrites!

I just feel so tired of everything. School is constantly on my mind even though it's winter break. It's just that feeling of knowing it's waiting for you haha. School...just makes me feel miserable. When all I come back to is being behind in biology and poor test grades I don't have any motivation to change that.

I'm mostly sick...of people. People who hurt other people, people who always turn out to be the bad guy, people who always break promises. The sad thing is that it's everyone :[ I've known too few people who are honestly genuine and unselfish. It's just...sad to realize.

Too much time alone with my thoughts = depression. Too much time without my thoughts = ignorance. It's just unavoidable.

to want to laugh and cry when I see this picture:

i just remember being happy :/ Not that I'm not happy now, though.

and also cuz Meilinn's face is hilarious LOL

Todayyy I got up, went bowling, then went to pho linhh then i went home and crashed haha i don't even know why i was so tired 2000 TEXTING LIMIT SUCKS!!! -_-"

Ahh I woke up late today! My alarm was for 830 but apparently my sister swears she saw me get up and turn it off haha. I ended up waking up at 945! We were supposed to meet at 10 @ Weck's but due to car troubles we all got there around 1045 XD After eating a huge breakfast we went to grab boba! I got a jazzie since they didn't have mythai :( we walked to urban outfitters where i did theee best dance with theee best swim suit hahahhaha "I'M JUST A WASTE OF TIME" is all i can remember! It was just the best. Then we proceeded to me holding something up...I cant even remember what it was because Gina then SPIT A PART OF BOBA ONTO MY HAND where I stared at it and then freaked out hahhaha. Thanks Gina. THANKS. that makes TWO of my friends who have spit on me hahahhah.

When I got home my sister took us to Targetttt and then she had to leave for work soooo I played guitar hero wiff my little brother haha.

Then I watched SPEAK, which proves that IN FIVE YEARS KRISTEN STEWART HAS STILL NOT LEARNED HOW TO ACT, and that was just a pretty bad movie lolll. Then..I watched Sleeping Beauty haha wtf?

Andddd yeah :)

maintenant! je suis parlez avec mon amour :) hahaha

when i watched the MV again Tracy and I got very squealy XD TAEYANG<3

So much for relaxing! I'm relaxing today...but I'm just bored and restless. It kinda sucks haha. I wanna go hang out! But I came home late both friday and saturday [well, at 10 ish] so I don't think my parents want me to go anywhere for a while XD Even though I'm going out tomorrow for lunch haha, AND I STILL DONT KNOW WHERE WE'RE GOING! But I'm very excited :)

I guess since I have so much time on my hands I'll write about the last few days haha.

On Friday we had our APUSH final and it was fine, since I knew all the answers. I finished super early so I was really paranoid and waited till Cruz got up XD hahaha. Then Malachi and I went on an adventure to his car and to his mom and whatnot hahah <3 Fifth period was our secret santa!!! I totally assumed when I opened Amber's gift it was a five dollar bill XD hahah but it was a starbucks giftcard! <3 [which i already used] haha. Evan liked my gift [i think] haha and taylor got malachi a NATIVE HACKEY SACK hhahaha it was the best thing ever our table played with it and I think Mr. Betsch was getting annoyed XD hahah but then Evan slammed it super hard hahah man it was hilarious. Uhh anyway! Sixth period talked to Mr. Seth for our "final" and then turned in my 3 biology packets!! In which she told me I got a freaking FIFTY FREAKING EIGHT ON MY MOTHER FREAKING FINAL! That's depressing. But she said 'YOU'RE FINE' meaning I got an A, or A- I hope? If it's a B+ Mrs. Leach will be seeing me again next year lolol. After school I went to check my grade in physics which was decent. Nnnd then we headed to boba since Jayface got me a giftcard :D and then we had to wait a million years but finally I got a mythai and a casanova for giao <3 When I got homeee I took a nap then Dong drove me to the talent show and it was pretty cool pretty cool XD I got home around 930 and yeahhh.

Saturday! Leslie picked me up so we can go get starbucks and exchange gifts. She got me a matching necklace and the shirt from hollister i wanted! The pink and green one :) <3 At the work day, we got boxes for luminarias and counted and cleaned up. Nnnd for the arts and crafts fair i didn't do much XD haha. sold a few things here and there [concessions] then left! Went to the library with my sister and brother, went to wal mart, and then came back to school for caroling! It was freezing but super fun haha. I'd say we had a good amount, two trunkfuls! :D

And today I did absolutely nothing...I'm almost tempted to do my homework! I need some good books to read though :( I really do think I've read everything at San Pedro. Booooring. Meh.

Oh dear. I think I've started on my winter break weight gaining hahaha.

It's been a crazy crazyyy few days.

I'm so glad it's winter break.

I hear my little brother singing "A Whole New World" in the background. And it's really adorable hahahahahah X]

I could write a million things right now but I'm lazy, sleepy, and don't feel like it.

Caroling was fun

"A DAZZLING PLACE I NEVERR KNEW (in high pitched voice)"
hahah

Finally! :) Tomorrow's friday! And the start of winter break :)

These last few days have been extremely hectic! Not only because of school and finals but personal, friends drama too. The craziest thing happened yesterday! Mr. A sent Niccole, Tracy, Leslie and I to central to put up a few signs about the arts and crafts fair on saturday. We saw this HUGE crazy tumbleweed and I said "If i was driving I'd probably run into this!" And Leslie says "Ngoc-An you would run into everything." I turned around, and BAM, two cars freakin hit each other. I pretty much stood there in shock and started screaming squealing, not sure what the fluck just happened. But finally we ran to one car, asking if she was okay. It was just her and her 4 year old son, who had a red scratch on the side of his head :( We ran to the other car and it turned out to be Raven, her brother and mom! I was really worried but she kept saying she was okay. Their car was really busted :( Oil and parts were errwhere. It was scuuury, but finally the police and ambulance came. Errgh.

Today was the art history and Biology final. I'm kinda worried because I feel like I did well but everytime I think that I end up doing horrible! So hopefully...it's decent. I'm SOOOOOO glad it's over though! Tomorrow is the US History and the rest of english but I really have no worries about that, I think it'll be fine.

I really want to give out Christmas presents already! :D monday monday monday!

Tomorrow is the Talent Show, and then Saturday is work day and Caroling for Canned Goods! Should be fun :)

Time for the last of the biology homework <3

Everything about it kinda sucked. First sucked. Third sucked. Fifth...well if Amber really was angry it wouldn't suck it would be hilarious but if she is...then it sucked. Even so Malachi made me laugh the whole freaking period!!! Lunch super sucked, seventh sucked!

1. It's more than I let on. I'm not going to be mopey all the time but if I could, I would. I know you don't understand it really but I just want you to know that whatever it is, it's obviously important right? It makes me so upset and I just wish I could let it all go. But it's not that easy.

2. I don't think you get it, but I'm seriously not going to be like that. It's plain and simple now. It's this or that...do this or not, decide this or not. Maybe it's too hard for you to have that mindset but honestly if you're not then maybe I don't want to deal with that...

And I'm so flucking hungry right now and my mommy cooked [in gina's words GOOK FOOD] but in my words DELIIIIICIOUSS FOODDD so I'm gonna go eat before I start on homework :)

My two biggest problems this week will probably be art history and biology :) I don't even know why i wrote that smiley.... </3 it's more like

>:o!!!!!

hah.
right now i got two people, Gina and Leslie, and they never disappoint me.
And Tracy makes me laugh no matter what she's doing...especially when it's not on purpose. And she always says 'fck you!' and flips me off and i laugh harder.

Senate tomorrow, studying studying studying, home, homework. The funny thing is I'm so excited for the break and I'm not really gonna have a break. I can't wait till Christmas though <3

And right now I hear the Lion King in the background :p It's calling me. Haha.

WINTERBREAK TO DO LIST!
1. CATCH UP IN BIOLOGY
2. Have the best Christmas ever
3. NOT gain 239578394753489 lbs.
4. Wake up early, sleep early
5. Finish all homework during first week
6. with family: bowling, iceskating, roller skating?
7. Hang out with only the most important
8. Eat a brownie earthquake from DQ :] yummm

What a crappy, not fun list. oh well.
"REDONKCULOUS!" - Taylor N. Dennis.

FROM WET SEAL! :p


SO CUTE

reallly cute

cuuuuuute

Only one more week until winter break :)

12.10
Reading to the little kids was so much fun!! The cutest kids were there <3<3<3 I'm a pedo :D Talking with Malachi = <3 I'm glad he trusts me and I trust him.

12.11.
First period was fine but second period pissed me off. If you need a mother flucking sign, don't tell us to make SIX HALF AN HOUR before the assembly, dumbass. Oh, did I mention that's AFTER you CUT OFF the sign we already made? I hate fifth period senate and idgaf. Third period, Yushi helped me with more genetic problems, I'm sooo thankful for that. I still have, about, 8 left? :( Fourth period was whatever, fifth Malachi and Amber always make me laugh XD, sixth period talked with Carolyn, Matt, and Joe haha :] <3 Seventh, launched BOTTTTLE ROCKKKETSSS! :p After school I went with Taytro to see Leslie's surprise in her car...which was...cute..AAAAAAnyway, then Leslie and I left to my house and I got all my stuff together. We then went to the mall for...a..bit XDXDXD and I got Christmas shopping done! It was so fun :] <3 We finally left, got ready, and went to dinner.

We changed the reservation to 20 because we made a list, and there were only about six, seventeen people. Butttt a few people we didn't expect showed up so we changed it to 25. I split Shrimp Jambalaya with Tracy and Leslie bought a huge black and white cake<3 Then we had frosting fun lololol XD hooot. Mmm...then Leslie drove me home...

12.12
Blehh I woke up today at 9:30 started on my art history right away, then did the laundry, cleaned up my room, put dishes away, continued homework, and then went to cottonwood :P I completely completely compleeeeeetely finished Christmas shopping. And I only bought one thing for myself! XD It's already 530 though :/

My dad is NOT the type of person to put up lights but for some reason he wanted to decorate our house! When he told me I sort of just stared at him in shock haha and we went to buy more lights today. It's almost Christmas, I can't wait :)

----
You know, it's been about a week...and I feel content, happy. I don't feel the need to change anything, especially since there's been no attempt. What's even worse is that I bet there's not even an understanding, or rather a feeling of doing something wrong. But you know what, that just makes it even easier for me to move on.